That Drifting Poo Was Way Too Symbolic! These Are the TV Disappointments of the Year.

As we consider the TV landscape of the recent year, a handful of shows emerge not for their excellence, but for their notable failures. From cringe-inducing sequels to bafflingly poor documentaries, here are the programmes that had us scratching our heads or simply reaching for the remote.

The 'Sex and the City' Sequel

Where to begin with this divisive spin-off? Burdened with dreadful scripts, painful arcs (we demand better for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of beloved Samantha, the series struggled to justify its existence. For a moment, as the third series began, it looked like it had at last hit its stride. Then arrived an installment centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the creator declared this would be the last series. It ended on a low point; the lingering shot of Miranda’s loo full of poo was just way too on-the-nose. Still, viewers undeniably found joy picking apart every single “wtf?” moment. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – danced around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't release a small sob?

All’s Fair

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? Of course she can’t.’

But that was almost the smallest of this show's issues. The recipient of a very rare no-star assessment, it was hard to know where to start enumerating the flaws. The laughably wooden dialogue? The tedious glorification of wealth and materialism? The almost deliberate parade of tropes? Performances so poor they felt borderline malicious? Let’s just say “all of the above” and forget about this show again. Except, a second season has been ordered, so we’re likely going to have to.

The Charlie Sheen Documentary

Given the restraining orders, abuse claims and fatherly shortcomings, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a troubled figure. Not that you’d truly have gleaned it from this multi-part docuseries which smirked its way at Sheen’s various bouts of self-destructive excess while struggling to tell us a single thing we didn’t already know. Rather, it felt as if this loose cannon was being indulged, so any sympathy this show might evoke should be reserved for the people who have had to endure proximity with this charming but flippant narcissist.

The Iris Affair

Of course we understood it was preposterous from the outset: a drama about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either save the world – or destroy all of humanity. We stuck with it out of pure love for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One barely reacted when his character died, and the other ended up hacking Charlie with an axe … in super slow-motion. Talk about giving up the ghost.

The Gangster Drama

Dodgy characters meeting in deserted boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and wants its gangland drama back.

Actually, that is harsh on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many seem a little dated now, but at least they didn’t suffer the embarrassment of having to accommodate baffling accents. But there were plenty of other issues. Primarily that it was just really boring; a dispute over drug-selling territory between various London picaresques which felt rather simplistic.

With Love, Meghan

Given the degree to which she provokes the ire of the nation’s performatively angry commentators, it’s temptingly tempting to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s televised forays into twee homemaking as intentional statements. But then you view them and are forced to concede that actually, they may have a point. It’s like watching a homeware magazine animated; a poster for evening drinks with ideas of grandeur; a procession of snoozing dogs, buzzing beehives, sentimental sayings and forgettable crafting “tips” you’ll forget instantly. All supported by immense, largely unearned wealth. Ugh.

The Beckham Documentary

There are clearly fascinating things to be discussed about regarding Victoria Beckham and her struggles with vocation, self-image, self-worth. But for whatever reason, this three-part series opted not to say them. Instead, the viewing was akin to consuming a marketing catalogue. She clearly has every right to resent what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But unfortunately, she failed to do herself any helps with this cagey letdown of a series.

The Inheritance

It should have been the next big hit – except even camper, with a famous star as a deceased benefactor and a well-known personality managing her inheritance. What more could you want? As contestants competed, there was plenty of betrayal and arguing. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s even now too complicated to detail what exactly was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw glimpses of the star via filmed videos. The show ended up reeking of a production that was straining desperately to emulate something way beyond it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How do you follow a show that defined a generation? The pressure was immense for this starry romantic comedy about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who lands in London with a shattered romance. The star took her biggest role by the horns and was joyous to watch, embodying Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very slick and, ironically, was insufficient. Plus, the sheer amount of famous cameos involved felt uncomfortable.

Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping

Not even good enough to be ‘uneven’.

Given the shrewd recruitment of gifted emerging comics, hopes were high. But sadly, most of it fell flat. A particular sketch was a one-note joke milked to a dry pulp but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a well-known ranting mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, in contrast, simply inspired the thought that they should probably have remained in there a bit longer.

The Knox Dramatisation

This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively presented the perspective of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an compelling drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this was not it. The material needed to be handled sensitively. Instead, the series struggled painfully to find the right tone, lurching from oddly jaunty, somewhat mannered farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Complex? Perhaps. A total mess? Very much so.

Prime Target

We love the lead actor … but did we believe him playing the greatest maths genius in history, a man so intelligent he’s on the verge of a discovery that could ruin society? Nope! This globe-trotting thriller about secret services spying on – and killing off – academics honestly got more absurd by the second. Formulaic nonsense.

The Bonnie Blue Documentary

This hagiography followed the content creator notorious for explicit exploits as she prepared for her biggest feat yet. What on earth would possess her? What we craved was far greater examination of her true psychology, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have spoken to the now-famous mum who appeared to haul her son away from the queue. What we got was horrific imagery and absolutely no interrogation of her notoriety whatsoever. And to think, the documentary-maker has a teenage daughter too.